Marriage and Relationship Counsellors

All our relationship therapists are experienced counsellors with specialist training in at least two models of couples relationship therapy. If you are struggling with a communication or connection issue, you can book with any of our couples counsellors – they can all help with that. If on the other hand, it is something more catastrophic, like an affair or violence, please book with one of our senior relationship therapists. If you are not sure who to book with and would like to talk to someone, please contact us here.

Senior relationship counsellors

Steven relationship counselling expert

Steven Dromgool – Director

  • Threatening to Leave?
  • Discovered an Affair or Infidelity
  • Unsure whether to stay or go
  • Needing more than an hour a fortnight to repair the relationship?

Steven specialises in working intensively with couples to assist them in rapidly moving out of crisis.  He offers a Rapid and Indepth Assessment Service and the Intensive Relationship Rescue.  These will help you begin to heal quickly and provides a series of online and in-person resources to kickstart the healing journey.

(Currently only taking new clients for Assessment, Intensives and Rescue Sessions )

Book Steven on Zoom

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Gerry (Victoria Park Market)

Communication, Affairs, Relationship Issues, Learning Difficulties, EMDR, Brain Training

Individual session: $230 (1 hr)
Couples session: $345 (1.5 hr)

Available Online and In-Person Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday

Book Gerry at Victoria Park Market

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Relationship counsellor
In Hwa relationship counselling expert

In Hwa (Victoria Park Market, Westmere & Mairangi Bay)

Relationship, Addiction, Communication, Mental Health, Cross-Cultural Issues

Individual session: $170 (1 hr)
Couple session: $240 (1.5 hr)

Thursday & Friday evenings and Saturdays in Auckland Central

Tuesday evening in Westmere – please phone 0204 735 283 to check availability

Sunday in Mairangi Bay

No surcharge for weekend sessions

Book In Hwa in Victoria Park Market & Mairangi Bay

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Brett (South Auckland)

Anxiety, PTSD, Communication, Affairs, Depression, Neuro-Linguistic Programming

Individual session: $150 (1 hr)
Couples session: $225 (1.5 hr)

Available Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday

Book Brett on Zoom and South Auckland

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Brett relationship expert

Sue –  (Zoom, Victoria Park Market)

Safe Communication, Cross-cultural Issues, Attachment, Anxiety, Depression

Sue is a fully qualified counsellor who is interning at Relate to extend her experience working with couples and become a specialist relationship counsellor.

Individual session: $120 (1 hr)
Couples session: $180 (1.5 hours)

Available Tuesday – Thursday online and alternate Saturdays at Victoria Park

Book Sue on Zoom

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Sue Intern Counsellor affordable counselling
Judy - Trauma Couples Therapist

Judy (Online)

Communication, PTSD, Trauma, Anxiety and Depression

Individual session: $150 (1 hr)
Couples session: $225 (1.5 hr)

Available Midweek online

Book Judy on Zoom

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Stefanie (Zoom & Victoria Park Market)

Relationship Issues, Blended Families and Communication Issues

Zoom session: $230 (1 hr)
Couples session: $230 (1 hr)
Individual session: $230 (1 hr)

Available Monday, Wednesday and Friday at Victoria Park and on Zoom

Book Stefanie on Zoom & Victoria Park Market

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Stefanie relationship counsellor
Garey relationship counsellor expert

Garey (South Auckland)

Communication, Intimacy Issues, Affair Recovery

Individual session: $110 (1 hr)
Couples session: $135 (1 hr)
Couples session: $180 (1.5 hours)

Available Tuesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday

Book Garey on Zoom and Papatoetoe, South Auckland

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Intern Relationship counsellors

Karen (Australia, Zoom)

Trauma-informed, Safe Communication, Relationships, Mood Disorders

Individual session: $A150 (1 hr)
Evenings sessions individual: $A170 (1 hr)
Couples session: $A120 (1.5 hr)

Available Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays

Book Karen on Zoom

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Aren – Intern Level 1 (Australia, Zoom)

Migration, Relationships, Communication, Anxiety, Cross-Cultural Issues

Individual session: $A60 (1 hr)
Couples session: $A90 (1.5 hours)

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Luke expert mindfulness anxiety depression stress

Dr Luke (Zoom)

Anxiety, Depression, Stress, Addiction, Mindfulness, Well-being Coach, Somatic Therapy

Individual Sessions: $200 (1 hr)

Available Monday-Saturday

Book Luke on Zoom

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Consultants

David – Addiction Specialist and 12 Step Consultant

Addiction, Porn and Sex Compulsivity, Gambling, Problem Drinking

Individual session: $200 (1 hr)
Couples session: $A300(1.5 hours)

Book David on Zoom

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David Addiction Therapist

HOW TO CHOOSE THE RIGHT RELATIONSHIP COUNSELLOR FOR YOU

So you have decided to see a marriage therapist or couples counsellor and now you are wondering how do you know who to choose?

Here are 3 handy research-based tips on how to choose the best counsellor for you.

Tip 1 – Choose a Relationship Counsellor You Feel Comfortable With

Research indicates that about a third of effectiveness in therapy is directly related to how comfortable you feel with your couples therapist.

Now obviously you haven’t met any of our relationship therapists yet and you are just looking online. It is useful to remember that your comfort levels with others, including a counsellor, are determined by your younger brain, which is both visual and intuitive. For this reason a picture is often handy as it can give you a feel for a person.

If you are coming as a couple it is important to find a relationship therapist you are both comfortable with (or at least not aversive too).  If one person in the relationship is pretty skeptical about therapy I normally recommend choosing a counsellor of the same gender unless they have a strong alternative preference.

Tip 2 – A Relationship Counsellor Needs to Know What They Are Doing

The same research into couples therapy indicated the another third of effectiveness is related to the therapist’s actual competence.  With couples therapy this is really important as Christensen’s research indicates that untrained couples therapists have only 50% success rate – which is the same as couples trying to figure things out by themselves, and also about the same as the divorce rate.

Expert or specialist marriage counsellors have success rates above 80%. Why such a difference?  It’s fairly simple, most training institutes include no training on how to work with couples or if they do, it’s theoretical training on outdated Systems Theory which was developed in the 1950’s.

Gottman’s research done in the 1980’s and 1990’s allows therapists to watch couples’ interactions and look for behaviours that we know predict divorce with over 90% accuracy.

So you are best looking for someone trained in Gottman Method Therapy, Emotionally Focussed Therapy, Imago Relationship Therapy, Psychophysiological Approach to Couple’s Therapy (PACT), Humanistic Existential Approach to Relationship Therapy (HEART), Presence Oriented Relationship Therapy (PORT) or the Developmental Approach to Couples Therapy.  The first 3 are most well known the last 4 have strong integrative elements from the first 3.

Choosing someone without this training is simply a gamble, like getting a plumber to build your house – sure they are a tradie and they know houses, but… what they don’t know are the specific strategies shortcuts and pitfalls a builder does.  The more fragile your relationship the more a specialist relationship counsellor is indicated.  Also at a practical level, specialist relationship counsellors are normally passionate about the work which leads to the third tip.

Tip 3 – A Relationship Counsellor Needs to Care

The final third of effectiveness of couples therapy, according to Eugene Gendlin, is related to the belief that your relationship counsellor or psychotherapist truly cares about you. Effective couples therapy requires you to be vulnerable with your partner and therapist and we simply don’t do this if we don’t feel cared for.  So once you have someone that you feel comfortable with, and you know has specialist training, your job in the first session is to get a sense of if they care.