Category Archives: Uncategorized

Getting your man* to talk Part 2 – the secret permission

In our last post I talked about many woman prefer an Empathy first response where as men respond far better to a Validation response, “You make sense to me.”  However the first block that many women face is getting their partner to participate in a discussion at all. There is a secret permission that many […]

Getting your man to talk – How most woman get it wrong – Part 1

Woman with nail in forehead communication problems

It’s not about the Nail is still one of my favourite short videos but I’d like to flip this topic on its head and talk about listening to men.  In my work as a marriage therapists who specialises in helping couples communicate it is pretty common for couples to enter the counselling room with an […]

Understanding the Child brain – Queen got it right, “I want it all, I want it NOW”

When it comes to understanding the Child brain Queen got it right.  Their hit song I want it all – I want it NOW sums up the governing ethos of the child brain [youtube=] The limbic (child) brain deals with the realm of emotion and physical sensory experience.  This part of the brain primarily develops […]

Understanding the Baby Brain – Symbiosis and Eternity

This gripping video reveals the power and importance of connection – it dramatically illustrates how vital emotional connection is to the infant. Watch the time delay from the still face till the infant notices . . . [youtube=] As  you enter the world of an infant it is crucial to understand how vulnerable and dependent […]

Why I don’t have a lizard brain – why male scientists should talk to their wives

In the 1960’s neuroscientist Paul Maclean developed a theory of the brain that proposed a layered development over the course of evolution from a reptilian base to mammalian ‘midbrain’ and the apex being the ‘human’ neo-cortex.  This model is no longer used much by scientists in the field but it remains popular in the lay […]

It’s not about the nail or Why men always try to fix things – Part 2

This is part 2 in this post, last post I talked about how men and women tend to be socialised to use two different empathy networks (the mirror neuron network and the TPJ (or lets fix it) network). But the big question is what do you do about it. There is a handy technique that […]

Could Pre-Marriage Counselling have saved Ronan Keating’s marriage

I have a confession I have always loved Ronan Keating’s singing.  I look the lyrics, his passion and the tenderness he portrays.  Like other’s I was saddened to hear that his marriage of 14 years had ended.  These musings were prompted again by a fascinating article about pre-marriage counselling in the Irish Times by columnist […]

Elisha Cuthbert – Living in the spotlight or getting misunderstood

Elisha Cuthbert famous from the long running series ’24’ recently caused a storm in a teacup when she rolled her eyes at the wife of her fiancee’s teammate who had just let a pivotal goal through and this was captured on video and relayed to Youtube as the start of a catfight. Aside from highlighting […]