Team Profiles (Click for More)
Janine - Ponsonby/Glendowie - AVL Mon-Fri (INCL A/H) - Gottman/Imago
Janine sees better relationships as the key to achieving individual happiness. She is passionate about helping individuals enrich their relationships with their partner, friends, family and especially themselves.
She is trained in Gottman method and Imago Relationship Therapy. More about Janine . . .
Availability: Ponsonby Mon/Tues (a/h) Glendowie Weds-Friday
PauL - Ponsonby/West Harbour - AVL Mon-Fri (Incl A/h) - Gottman/Imago
Paul's experience working with individuals showed how fundamental a safe, mutually trusting connection with a partner is to the experience of joy and wellbeing in life.
He is trained in Imago Relationship therapy and Gottman Method. More about Paul . . .
Available: North Harbour: Mon-Fri, Ponsonby Mon, Weds (a/h)
Deirdre - Ponsonby - AVL Tues, Thurs (incl A/H) Narrative/Gottman/Imago
Deirdre's approach is gentle, centred and wise. She will help you find new perspectives and insight on the relationship or personal problems you’re facing.
She is trained contemporary narrative, constructive, and mindfulness counselling styles and current neuroscience. More about Deirdre . . .
Availability Ponsonby Tues, Thurs (West Auckland coming soon)
SteveN - Ponsonby -AVL Mon-Fri (Weekends for Intensives) - Imago/ Gottman/ EFT/ PACT/ MIRT
Steven's approach is connection and communication focussed and tailored specifically for each individual couple.
He is cross trained in 4 approaches to couples therapy and helped develop a 5th approach more about Steven. . .
Availability Ponsonby Mon-Fri, Weekends for Intensives and Marathon sessions only
Stefanie - North Shore/Titirangi - AvL Mon, Thurs, Fri (Incl A/h) - Imago Cert THerapist
Stefanie approach is hopeful and pragmatic. She believes that every relationship has the option of success given the right intervention.
She is trained in Imago Relationship Therapy (Cert Therapist) . Stefanie is also fluent in German. She is also interested in working with youth more about Stefanie . . .
Availability Titirangi Mon, North Shore Thurs, Fri (a/h)
NIGEL - Ponsonby - AVL Thurs - Youth/FaMILIES -Narrative/Gottman
Nigel is passionate about working with youth and men in relationships, his deep understanding of masculinity gives him a powerful ability to deepen connection between couples.
He is trained in Narrative Therapy and Gottman Method more about Nigel . . .
Available Mt Albert Tues, Ponsonby Thurs
Margo - Ponsonby - AVL SAT (A/h) - Gottman, Imago, HypnoTherapy, Sex Therapy
MSc; BBS (Hons); PGDip Couns; RC Hyp, Dip.Hyp Dip. NLP
Margo is particularly interested in working with couples and individuals struggling with sexual, emotional and intimacy issues. Her approach is caring and solution focussed.
She is trained in Gottman Method, Imago Relationship Therapy, Sex Therapy and Hypnotherapy and is training in Integrated Relationship Therapy
Available Ponsonby from Mid March, Sat (a/h)
Magdalena - Ponsonby: Wed/Thu/Fri (A/H) Gottman, Imago
MPsych; PGDip Couns; MNZAC
Magdalena is passionate about helping couples move through distress into deeper connection. Her approach is mindful and direct.
She is an experienced drugs and alcohol counsellor. She is trained in Gottman Therapy and Training in Imago Relationship Therapy and training Integrated Relationship Therapy.
Available Ponsonby Wed/Thur/Fri (a/h)
Sharon (Intern) - Ponsonby - Weds (A/H) - Gottman, Imago
Sharon is personally committed and infinitely curious about the work of coupledom. Her approach is thoughtful, measured and perceptive.
Sharon is Relate's Robert de Niro (The Intern). A classically trained psychoanalyst with over 30 years experience she is moving into couples work in a more intentional way. Sharon is trained in Imago Relationship Therapy, Gottman Method and is training in Integrated Relationship Therapy
Available Ponsonby Weds (a/h)
Recommendations by Issues
This is the single most common issue in therapy - mainly because couples who can't communicate will tend to have issues in their relationships and couples with issues in their relationships tend to struggle to communicate about those issues.
So in short any of the team is equipped to deal with this.
Some tips on how to choose from here:
Recommendation 1: Gender Match the Therapist to the most Nervous Partner
Who is the most nervous about coming to therapy?
If it's the guy we tend to recommend a male therapist (unless the man has a stated preference)
If it's the woman we tend to recommend a female therapist again (unless the woman has a stated preference)
Recommendation 2: Check out the photo
We get a lot of information about how safe we feel with someone visually - so if you have a generally positive reaction to the photo of the therapist that is a good sign. You are unlikely to bond well with someone you don't like the look of.
Recommendation 3: Gender match with previous positive experiences in therapy
If you have had good previous experiences in the past with a female therapist, try booking a female again - and vice versa. (Note this recommendation is less powerful than the previous 2 but if neither of you is particularly nervous and the photos all seem fine - that would be a recommendation.)
Affairs are complex issues to address, simply because typically both parties are under huge stress and not operating at their best and the interactions can tend to go wrong pretty quickly. So for this issue we recommend not engaging one of the interns.
Steven has a particular interest and specialisation in this issue and he offers intensives and marathon therapy in this regards.
Janine, Deirdre and Paul also regularly work with this issue and in fact the team tends to be quite collaborative in this regard - so you may start with Janine and she may recommend that the male partner work with Steven or Paul around a particular issue and send the female partner to see Deirdre while Janine manages the couple sessions.
About the Relate Team
Our therapy team includes counsellors, psychotherapists and a psychoanalyst all trained in at least two different approaches to working with couples - including our interns.
Why do we make such a big deal about our team being trained in multiple approaches?
The research is very clear - marriage therapy with an untrained couples therapist is not only less helpful it can actually do harm.
The various approaches tend to lift success* rates from around 50% to 70-80%. By cross training in different approaches and collaborating as a team we have found we can lift that number towards 85%.
This makes sense to us intuitively. We are all individuals, and we believe a more flexible approach recognises and honors this.
*Success in the research is normally defined as significantly lowering a couples distress and conflict - often measured on the Dyadic Adjustment Scale (DAS)
How do I choose a counsellor?
Step 1: Check out the pictures and profiles and see who you feel drawn to.
Step 2: Click the names or photos to access booking and see their availability
Step 3: Book a session online.
If you have further questions give us a call on 020 4 RELATE (735 283) or email us
Why are we different
The primary criteria for joining the Relate Team is Passion!!!!
Yes we emphasise training, teamwork and experience but our experience and research shows that if you don't feel someone cares for you, or about relationship work in general, your therapy or counselling is unlikely to be successful.
Why do we do this? Simply put we believe that relationships can be fabulous - we want that for ourselves and we want you to have that too ...
We promise that we will bring our best. To work in partnership with you. To give you the best chance of having the relationship of your dreams.